14 seconds. The post was up 14 seconds before I opened the app. I keep telling people this and they hear it wrong so I will go slow. I did not plan the session. I picked the phone up to check the time, the kitchen clock is wrong again, separate problem, and my thumb opened the feed on its own, the way thumbs do. And there it was, one of the eleven, timestamped 14 seconds old. Fourteen.

Nobody knew I was opening the app. I didnt know.

"Maybe it posts all day." It does not. I checked the history, eleven posts in six days, and the one that matters lands a quarter minute ahead of a session I did not plan. Something upstream knew the session was coming. The nine second thing had the same smell and I am not relitigating it here, the waveform pages are up.

I reported nine of the eleven. Form letter back, "does not violate our guidelines." Guidelines. Filed the letters with the screenshots. Folder is at 51 now. It was 47 when I started the list page.